On 14 October 2007, SandE writes:

I write this with a heavy heart and with great sadness. My beloved Beau-Dudley is dying. He has a tumor the size of a soccer ball in his belly; actually I think they said in his spleen. I have brought him home and have decided not to have the surgery, which they are not sure he would live through and it could buy him a couple months or maybe a year or more, or he could die in surgery. If he had the surgery, they recommend chemotherapy. I would not have chemo for myself, so I definitely would not put my dog through it. So they warned me that Beau-Dudley could die at any time. I could wake up or come home from work and find him, but as long as he is not suffering (and I hope to God I will know) I will keep him with me and hope he passes quietly and peacefully. So please everyone, send Zen and your prayers to guide us through this most difficult time. Most of all, pray that my beloved doesn't suffer.

The next day:

Even though the prognosis is poor, he ate a little last night and this morning. I took him for a very short walk because he always ran with me in the morning and he was standing by the door this morning when I took the other two dogs with me. So I took him for a little walk even though I was advised against it. It's about quality of life so my boy shall have whatever he wants in his final days.

I just pray that he will not suffer. I know that he's uncomfortable due to the tumor in his belly pushing on his heart and other organs and I believe they said there is some bleeding. When does uncomfortable cross over to being in pain????? I pray I will know so I can set him free.

Beau-Dudley has brought so much love & joy to my life . . . I just can't imagine life without him . . . not going to think about that right now . . . I will concentrate on him living a quality life for the little time he has left.

YVONNE MURGATROYD, SONNY & FINGERPRINTS:

Our thoughts are with you.

JACKIE McGUINNESS:

Sorry to hear your sad news; for what it's worth, I think you made the right decision. It may seem hard just now, but you can control the pain and have him home with you. He can still have his favourite treats and you get the chance to spoil him.

Sending loads of Zen
Jackie & The Wild Bunch

KATHI & SIMON:

I share your sorrow at losing your dear boy to cancer. I went through this in March-April of this year with my beloved Nellie.

I will of course pray for a peaceful passing, and for you to have the wisdom to know if he needs intervention in passing to The Bridge.

My heart aches for you.

On 16 October, SandE writes:

Dearest Airedale Friends,

First I would like to Thank all of you for your wonderful emails. Your kind words, thoughts, Zen & prayers are the wind beneath my wings at this sad time. I am savoring every moment with my precious boy. It's so hard knowing that our time together is short; however, I am very fortunate & thankful to have this time to spend with him.

I would like to share with you an email I received from friends Vance & Brenda:

I can accept bad news about relatives or friends better than I can about animals. I always try to convince myself it was my chosen job and responsibility to care for an animal and provide my absolute best for as long as they are on this earth. Suppose he (Beau-Dudley) was left to wander around the streets of Tennessee, got hit by a car or shot at again by some low-life. Dudley hit lotto when he came to you. He has received the best. The agony you will go through now is the absolute most gut- wrenching part of your love. It is your job, however, to care for as many of these creatures that you are able to for as long as you are on this earth.

Our sympathy at this time is not enough,

I am sharing this because the last sentence in this post gives me the strength & courage to see my boy through this and help him cross The Bridge in my arms and for him to walk peacefully to the other side of The Bridge when the time comes. It also is about all of you who in one way or another have touched the lives of these wonderful dogs and each other because of your commitment to a better life for our four-legged friends.

Beau-Dudley is doing very well today. He is acting like himself. Instead of having to steal the c*tıs food when nobody is looking, he found a little something extra in his dish this morning. I'm sure he's still trying to figure that one out after being shooed out of the c*t's food for the last six years!

Here are two pictures I took tonight of my sweet, loving boy. He really is camera-shy, so these two are the best of the lot.

Bless you all,
SandE
The Wonderful Beau-Dudley, who by the way, is the BEST dog in the world
Mz Lizzie (who's the Queen Bee)
KC Bix (who has the spirit of an Airedale in a six-pound Toy Poodle body)
& the Furs (c*ts)

MAUREEN SCOTT, LL, MS PIX & PS:

Beau-Dudley is quite a boy. I'm glad that we have all those pictures, and the account of his journey to New York.

Sending lots of AireZen for Beau and for SandE, too . . . .

PAULA:

Oh Sande - I am so sorry . . . may these last weeks/months be a time of building fond memories. It must be so hard to know it is coming so soon.

MARE MOORE:

Bless you, SandE, for saving Beau-Dudley from the mean streets and giving him a wonderfully love-filled life. For what it's worth, we concur with your thinking re: chemo. So, cherish whatever time you have left together and SPOIL HIM SHAMELESSLY!!

Thoughts of peace and Canadian AIREzen being sent your way . . .