BRENDA'S FAREWELL TO CEELEE
As I sit here, I have tried to write several times and stop. I sit and cry and write some more. Our Ceelee came into CRUSA's world with high positive HW. Not knowing my little girl had gotten pregnant a few days before we got her, I had her treated. When Ceelee came home with me, I kept her crated except to potty and a little love time.
When I would let her out of crate she would sometimes grab her blankie and walk away with it. She pranced while she did this. Then, there were times, she would drop the blankie and grab my pants leg and try to take off with me. I would laugh and say, "Ceelee, you can't carry me, little girl."
Ceelee would also grab my fingers and gently just take them into her mouth, as if to say, "HI MOM." She was a light in my life that lifted me and made me smile. She loved to snuggle with me.
Yesterday started off with me calling the hospital as soon as I got up. She was doing about the same, they said. I drove out a little later, but couldn't see her, due to surgeries going on, but they said as soon as they were completed, Dr. Estill would call me.
Ceelee's tail bandaged up at surgery
Since I couldn't see her for a few hours, I went with my sister & family (they are in from Tennessee). The whole time, I kept thinking, "Doc, call me". Dr. Estill finally called; Ceelee had passed another piece of what looked like leather, about the same size as before, and newspaper. Since I don't use newspaper and don't take the paper, I knew it didn't come from my house. Again, Dr. Estill said it looked like it had been there for awhile. She also thought she was in sepsis shock.
Ceelee didn't look well; I told Doc I would be there soon. I knew it was time to send Ceelee to the Bridge and I wanted to be there with her. She had fought hard, but her little body just couldn't take any more and I wasn't about to put her through surgery and Dr. Estill also said Ceelee wouldn't make it through surgery.
3 October 2010
Dr. Estill called me: "Ceelee is gone. She was okay and then she was gone." I could tell she was crying. The whole clinic loved her. I told her that I felt her leave; people may not believe me, but I knew my baby was gone. I told Dr. Estill that I would be there shortly, I wanted to hold my baby one last time.
I walked into the clinic and Laurie got up and grabbed me and we both cried. I went into the room and Dr. Estill came in, Ceelee was wrapped in a blankie. Doc was crying. Ceelee was a part of the clinic and everyone loved her and pulled for her. She fought hard. I held my girl, kissed her many times, told her that we all loved her and that so many people who didn't know her had sent their love, money & prayers.
Ceelee will be cremated and whenI pass away, her ashes will be put with mine, just like all of my babies who have passed will be. My sister, trying to make me laugh, said that there wasn't gonna be a big enough box for all those ashes. She knows that her baby sis - "Elly Mae Clampett" as my Daddy called me - will be with her babies even in death. I love them that much.
3 October 2010
Leaving Ceelee was hard, but knowing she was running & playing with her babies, Saylor and those who are the Bridge made me smile through my tears. A Cairn is a stubborn breed and one thing for sure, Ceelee proved she was too stubborn to go until she couldn't hold on any more.
So, my friends, I came home and held onto my babies. My own & my fosters, cried so hard I couldn't see. They came to kiss me and seemed to know. Zack, my foster, just coming up to kiss me and stayed right by my side all night.
I went to bed and when I woke this morning grabbed the phone to call and check on Ceelee; habits die hard I guess. So now I am completing Ceelee's final entry; her story has ended, but never to be forgotten.
For you see, that even though our Ceelee has gone to Rainbow Bridge, her vet costs are still there. So many have asked me, do you still need the money? Yes please donate, show Ceelee that she isn't forgotten. Even if donations were to exceed her final bill (which is $3657.53), CRUSA will used on our other Cairns who need our help, like Cappy (our Chinese Crested wannabe, as Peggy says) who has skin & thyroid issues [read Cappy's story HERE] and for those puppy mill dogs waiting to come in.
Foster homes are so needed in the Southeast & Northeast. Not all our stories are like Ceelee's, most have happy endings, like Bodie & Bella Rose, who went home last week and are truly adored. Seeing those smiling faces and tears when they meet their new babies for the first time means everything.
So many people say, "I can't foster, I'd never let them go." But you can, knowing they are going to great homes and if we don't have foster homes, we can't bring them in.
My final farewell, to Ceelee, is my heart is hurting but I shut my eyes and watch you prance with your blankie. I see you when I came to the hospital and you know that I am there and take my fingers into your mouth and hold them. You seem to jump into my arms and lie there as if to say, "Hold me, Mom." The staff said, "She perks up so much when you come in."
My Ceelee Nichole, your light has been extinguished on this earth,
but not in my heart. I love you, Ceelee girl.
SUE LOSINGER:
Thank you for taking the time to write and make us cry. We all need to remember that there isn't always a happy ending with these sad little gals & guys, but if we all pull together, maybe we can make a difference in the lives of those that we can rescue.
I am so very sorry that she didn't make it, but that she is now free, free from the mill, free from the pain. Run free, Ceelee, run.
DOREEN MUNDIE:
You know real love and blessed are those on whom you shine it.
BETTE BOYERS:
I am so sorry to hear this. My thoughts and prayers are with you, BJ and Peggy. She gave it her best shot. Won't CRUSA please give these two a healthy pup!! They need some sunshine in their lives!
KATIE KNEESEL:
What a beautiful tribute, BJ. Ceelee was so lucky to have had you and your love. God Bless you for taking such good care of her. I know how much you cared about her. Hugs from me and slobbery kisses from my girls Sugaree & Lucy.
BENNIE JONES:
I could not have said it better, it is sad that Ceelee has gone, but she knew she was loved, cared for, and was in a place that her pain was lessened. I cannot imagine how she would have died if not rescued. Thank you, BJ & Peggy, for all the love & assistance you give to our fur friends. Ceelee, you have gone where there is no pain and the friends are waiting there for you.
Rest in Peace, you beautiful girl.
BENNIE JONES:
Shame on those who had her before and allowed her to be in pain and have heartworms. It is so hard not to have so much hate for these puppymills. I have to turn it to the love that CRUSA represents and all the work that is done for those rescued, no matter how short the time they are with CRUSA. Thank you again, BJ & Peggy, for all you do.
Bj, thank you for this; your entries allowed us to follow you and cheer for Ceelee, bless her heart. Why was she eating these things, I dare not go there. It makes me realize the need more than ever to rescue as many puppy mill dogs as we can, as CeeleeÕs story is etched in my mind, and this should never, never happen to another Cairn. Without your support and your sharing, we cannot know the horror of puppymills so we can help them. Celee was shown love, caring, and relief because of you and others who care. I cannot thank you enough.
NORA DONALD:
I am so very sorry for y'all and the whole CRUSA family. So many people were pulling for Ceelee. She was a beautiful girl.
Thank you for all the work you do for the Cairns.
DONNA MARIE & SCOTT KOEGLER:
There are no words to express the deep sorrow we are feeling with and for you as you have lost a most precious baby. You fought a valiant fight and so did she. I believe with all of my heart that she is on the other side of the Bridge waiting for you and all her fur family.
We are still encouraging donations to pay for her bill . . . and we will continue to do that. Whatever stress that can be relieved from you is what we are looking to do.
Brenda writes:
I just wanted to say thank you from the bottom of my heart for all the emails, calls, etc. I picked up Ceelee's ashes today, I have her paw print and some of her hair also.
I cried like a baby as I held those ashes in my hands. Thanks ever so much,
14 October 2010
MAUREEN SCOTT:
Poor CeeLee . . . .
My very deep sympathy to those who cared for CeeLee during her last days. Some dogs never have any love in their lives. At least CeeLee had her full share at the end of her life . . . .
SHELLY SIMINSKI:
Thank you for sending this; as sad as it is. it makes me so very proud to know each and every one of you! You all know the true meaning of love and the completeness loving a Cairn gives to our lives. I'm proud to be a part of such loving, caring, and giving group. These two ladies gave it their all. God bless you, Ceelee, for touching all our lives; kiss those pups. You are all now forever free, healthy and forever home.
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